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Summary:
This is the second article is a response to the work done in China by industry consultants. China, May 12 suffered its worst earthquake for 30 years from eight on the Richter scale, now more than 70,000 dead and millions homeless and injured in this. After the earthquake people across China, the children were concerned with the plight of victims of the tragedy of loss of parents and left the death.good-hearted people in a hurry for the adoption of these children to offer to give them a new home and a new beginning. This document is the psychology of what a child, severe mental anguish for many months if not years, and thus have the potential adoptive parents about the dangers run, explore, should pass quickly, which could turn into a child with severe mental future.
Introduction:
The study of adoption of children is goodmainly based in the United States and Europe to show seen by disasters in other areas and the long-term study of the effects of psychological damage in children in the short and long term. Already in 1937, David Levy in the United States initiated the first study of how children are affected by taking in a foreign family in a new environment and the absence of the biological mother. Levy has seen the situation of these children from an early age and the cumulative effect overcoming years, mental health problems in adulthood. Since these pioneering projects, many other psychologists and later confirmed the loss of acceptance, if forced to help the over-rides the needs of the child.
The effect of the decision:
Jean MacLeod wrote in adoptive families magazine "The daily life with a new baby who is afraid and perhaps anger or rejection, with little sleep can also convinced his parents to lose their composure," This isthe fundamental problem of removing the child from his environment, the natural parents and friends in a strange house (but comfortable) to start a new life, where everyone knew and understood that it was taken away from them in a moment of terror.
The children of the earthquake are suffering emotional problems brought on my sudden loss of their birth parents, soon after, as young children and moderate to adolescence. Each child, depending on age and experience to cope with the lossin different ways, often with similar reactions. Most young people have the possibility of a binding relationship with the biological mother, this was often the personality is profound, and later physical and mental aspects of a child are fused together in the child (Clothier 1943). Child Development Research by psychologists as important as Bowlby (1960) clearly show the influence of sudden loss, separation anxiety and developmental disorders on the psyche of a child in the futureand as highly dysfunctional adults later in life. Even with the best substitute mother in the world of interactionism subtle effects at an early stage of development is not in kindness and patience are made by an adoptive parent. Older children aged two to ten years to know that they have a personal loss, but can not assess how the pain with the reality of the situation. Disbelief, as in any grieving process is the initial reaction, and refuse any angryAttempt to restore her parents in another family. In China, because of the one-child policy has this concern, even worse, as no older siblings than for secondary distribution of association and the grieving process for them. For young people may be worse yet - have the cognitive ability to understand the loss, but I'm too young to be left alone, and as younger than they really are treated by well-intentioned employees. They often feel their needs are ignored and the sense ofSelf-determination is not included because the authorities of their own destiny for the next five to ten years ago.
What to expect new adoptive parents?
The emotional problems are manifested in many ways, but some are more in most age groups, including fear of close relationships, low self-esteem, and anger, immaturity, products that problems such as lying, oppositional behavior at school are not enough, temperament, frustration and depression. (KatzM.)
The fear of a close relationship:
They're young, your parents were killed in an earthquake, and it was sudden, shocking and unexpected. Are you alone now, stranger, feed them, repairing, you can not speak or understand Adviser, the words. Personal effects are the things that will entertain you went. Soon told to go to a nice couple you care? Are you confused of who these strangers, I want yourself? The firstLearn what most of them children, adults trust or confidence in this child's reactions to situations can often be the basis for decisions. were taken away in the spirit of the child's parents are lost forever, no chance for one last goodbye and kiss, hug or smile. This can happen again and took the child at that time decide that someone is always terribly wounded in the area, so the only way to keep your distance physically and mentally. The new parents can not understand whySon hates her, supported her kindness, and not to communicate with them, now new parents feel guilty, they want to give the child back, they think this new opportunity, this new beginning ungrateful. The new parents are beginning to reject the child and the child sees this refusal as a confirmation of their new faith, which is close to dangerous. In the spirit of the child's safety is a car without adult care.
Low self-esteem:
All agesChildren who feel the sudden loss as somehow a punishment for what they do or do not think before the earthquake. For an adult, this is irrational thinking, but a child, it makes sense. They (children) must have done something wrong to be punished in a terrible way. Feelings of worthlessness abound as the child grows. New parents talk about expectations for the future, as they are going to help the child to do something, but the child that pressure on requestnew parent is hard work, if you have not even had time to cry for their loss. This thought leads to the "Chosen Child" complex in which the child feels particularly to new parents and then make every effort to show their gratitude for the acceptance. But trying to live for the child, these expectations can lead to feelings of failure, lack of self-esteem and depression. You can not have the "perfect child" for them and emotionally drained. As the child growssee the physical differences between them and their adoptive parents, this further underscores their alienation and the feeling of being in the family and the world out of place.
Anger:
The child in anger expressed their frustration with the new situation, can not expand, do not feel comfortable family apartment, not the chatter of friends and other family members feel that it is difficult to understand things without feeling uncomfortable to ask. Finally, their emotionsboil and break. The trouble is sudden and violent, often for minor children not to drop or break new toy to give as a way to lose their pain and feelings of the new in this world.
Immature:
Older children are developmentally, then go back on some aspects of their behavior. Lying is not widespread, some of the new parent company, please, say they are happy (when of course) I thank you more than normal (as a sopdeny the new parents) breaking or theft of money (to prepare for another loss - the money is useful to save money). oppositional behavior is manifested in the need for autonomy, the refusal of aid to be the new parent company, thinks that the lack of a suitable model that looks and acts like they do, can lead to emotional problems such as underachievement and school violence to other children.
The new parents:
For the adoptive parents may this time, particularlydifficult they thought they were doing something noble, a good deed for society is that those children who had a tragic start in his young life. But over time, and all the emotional turmoil of problem behaviors of the child, an experience that you feel frustrated, angry, violent, and in some cases the child is verbally and emotionally abusive. The young child has a dream into a nightmare of sleepless nights and constantly on the struggle for control. Since there isnatural bond of parents feel that children in care as soon as a visitor until he no longer needs. As the child grows is like a biological parent, adoptive parents and often of the opinion that the problems over the years, the fault of the parents are dead and blame them for not teaching the child proper behavior when they were alive. Also new parent company of the patient resulted in a test of will on many occasions with the child have problems andRefusal.
Genes question:
There is no doubt that genes play a role in the physical aspects of a child and looks for growth. This should not, however, with social development that takes place, be confused in the first family, colleagues and significant others later. As the child grows you can see that they do not like the other members of the family attraction, and physical appearance. This is not to belong to two psychological consequences, first of all a feeling thatIdea of an outsider and the second the feeling mentally different. This is not necessarily true, but only a need for self-knowledge. This often leads children to ask more questions about where they come from, who their real parents, what happened to them because she left me with you, I'm a bad person then how can I find? This is a time of great difficulty for new parents who are facing the prospect of an end, perhaps after years of denial have been if the management of theirConcern.
Rejection based on:
Many young parents are not able to cope with the problem and the child came to the conclusion that the child back to the adoption agencies to give back to other parents filled. This is especially true for the number of couples to raise children, the damage must seize this opportunity to a child of the earthquake, so not one of them. Others can not cope with the loss of face. They said that the neighbors are going to adopt a childthe earthquake as a badge of honor. Subsequently, they have the problem of the son of the neighbors who witnessed the very same time to hide the behavior described above. Those who can cope for a few more years of sending your child to boarding school as a way for little 'peace for himself, but the child sees this as a further loss of confidence. Some of the serious psychological issues can be hidden, or to develop psychiatric hospitals, many never to return. For the growing child, this canthe last straw in a long series of refusals, and painful experience, which often leads to long-term psychiatric care and suicide attempts or drug addiction.
In summer:
The earthquake in China like so many other terrible disasters caused thousands of children without parents, homeless and grieving. Many people of good heart and care assistance, and to adopt these children tragic. But not all new parents are ready for this task with the best intentionsWorld, many with emotional damage a child's psychological anxiety that has followed throughout his life something? For many children who would rather stay in the area in which they grew up surrounded and make a new start with the familiar. Children's loss of bond between them much more solid than other adults. The issues of trust, security and routine are more important than it is now people with good intentions who think that money can comfort, care and takePlace of birth parents in the short term or long term. No solution is perfect - but new parents should be aware of the responsibilities assumed by the child of the tragedy! In this study, I looked at the negative aspects of adoption and for good reason and should be warned to stop and think about new potential adoptive parents for the first act and then with compassion. Of course, the children of adoptive parents grow in their new home and loving, caring parents appreciate. However, nonew parent company begins with the child, the great rush and I love you mom says five minutes after arrival. Realism is called in this tragedy, to protect the interests of the child and its future as part of a harmonious society in China.
End .....
References:
David M. Levy, (1937) American Journal of Psychiatry - 94, Primary Affect Hunger.
F. Clothier MD, (1943) the psychology of the adopted child
Verrier NN (1993) PrimalWound
J. Bowlby (1965) Loss / Separation Anxiety
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